I Am The Fairy Queen

When I was in Bali a few years back, giant red wasps followed me everywhere. I could be in a group of 10 people and no one but me had these little ones buzzing around them. At breakfast, one landed right in front of me and stayed long enough for me to turn out this sketch. I love Wasps!

Last night I came home to find a dead red wasp in my apartment, just inside the entrance from the balcony. I felt dismayed because I was barefoot and my apartment was dark. I could easily have stepped on that thing and gotten a nasty sting. I was strangely nervous and irritated by it for a few reasons. The first is that it was rather big. The red wasps here in Zagreb are full bodied creatures with a big hum. They are confident, which means that Goddess has gifted them with a badass stinger. The other reason I was uneasy was because I could sense that the thing was still alive. For some reason, the thought of bugs suffering death is really heartbreaking for me. Look, I know that a lot of people couldn’t care less about insects. But for me, I have a profound attraction to them. I am curious, afraid, amazed and in love with them. Bugs are designed to perfection. There is nothing wasted on them. Every part has a beautiful form and function. Wasps in particular, are GORGEOUS. Tiny waists, big eyes, and a stinger to light you on fire! Wasp, I am proud to say, is my Spirit Guide.
A few years ago, I discovered this when I was on a run in the dry hills of Orange County. Three giant Tarantula Hawks went with me on that run and they informed me that I was ‘of them.’ They called me the Fairy Queen and they said that I am quite fit and ready to rule my kingdom judiciously.  You can take a peek at that post and follow my adventures on Facebook if you feel inspired!  By the way, this adventure with the Wasps happened at the same time I sold my business and learned that my mother was dying.  I think that this was the Universe telling me that it’s time to step into Queendom, now that my mom was dying.  She was always the queen and I the princess, but her transition meant that I would now be so much more.
When Wasp comes, it is always to remind me that I am the Fairy Queen and a natural architect. I am the designer, not just of life, following my heart to love and adventure, but I am the architect that builds the bridges that unite Light and Shadow, the Inner World with the outer world, and the Spiritual world with the material world. I am an architect with vision, ambition and know-how. I am Queen of Fairies.

This Wasp nest is an architectural masterpiece and much kinder than a tarantula’s body!!! In Bali, the Wasps were constantly building their nests in my room. They never hurt me, so I learned to sit back and just watch them do their thing.

Yesterday, I sat for hours getting my hair braided. It is a love-hate relationship, me and hair braiding. I love having my hair braided, but it’s 12-24 hours of sitting and getting my tender scalp pulled. Yesterday, I sat while three women pulled and combed and tressed me. At one point, my hair was piled up on top of my head and I looked in the mirror and thought, I look like a queen with a braided crown! When Fanny Germaine Markić finished my hair, I was delighted and full of myself. I always feel most like me when my hair is in this style. Long straight braids. I <3 it!
 
When I got home last night, I kicked off my shoes and was padding around the apartment in the dark. That’s when I saw my little Spirit Guide in front of my sliding glass doors. My 3-dimensional, ego told me that I should move the beast outside. I forced myself to go and confront the tiny carcass and when I did, I found that he was still alive. I decided to follow my gut instinct, which was to let him rest in peace. Don’t disturb his transition. He was in my space for a reason and I was not to simply sweep him away. So I sent him my usual blessings and appreciated his life and then I got in bed.
 
Before going to sleep, though, I took a card from The Wisdom of Avalon Oracle deck. I asked, “What is the message from the little Wasp?” Can you guess what card I pulled? THE QUEEN.
 
The message from The Queen and my little Wasp guide? I am fully aligned. I am in the Vortex. I AM that I AM. <3
 
And of course, don’t fuck with Fairies.

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